Indians Think That the Fastest Thing is theDiarrhea

An Office Manager at Wal-Mart was given the task of hiring an individual to fill a job opening.
After sorting through a stack of resumes he found four people who were equally qualified — an American, a Russian, an Australian and a Gujarati from India.

He decided to call the four in and ask them only one question.  Their answer would determine which of them would get the job.

The day came and as the four sat around the conference room table the interviewer asked, “What is the fastest thing you know?”

Dave, the American, replied, “A THOUGHT.  It just pops into your head.  There’s no warning that it’s on the way; it’s just there.  A thought is the fastest thing I know of.”

“That’s very good!” replied the interviewer.

“And now you sir?” he asked Vladimir, the Russian.
“Hmm…. let me see.  A blink!  It comes and goes and you don’t know that it ever happened.  A BLINK is the fastest thing I know.”

“Excellent!” said the interviewer.  “The blink of  an eye, that’s a very popular cliché for speed.”

He then turned to George, the Australian who was contemplating his reply.

“Well, out at my dad’s ranch, you step out of the house and on the wall there’s a light switch.  When you flip that switch, way out across the pasture the light in the barn comes on.  Yep, Turning on a LIGHT is the fastest thing I can think of.”

The  interviewer was impressed with the third answer and thought he had found his man. “It’s hard to beat the speed of light” he said.

Turning to Patel, the Guy from India, the fourth and final man, the interviewer posed the same question. Patel replied, “Apter herring da 3 prebius ansers sir, et’s obius to me dat the fastest thing is DIARRHEA.”

“WHAT!?” said the interviewer, stunned by the response. The others were  already giggling in their seats…

“Oh, I can expleyn sir,” said Patel.

“You see, sir, da ader day my tummy was pheeling bad and so I run so fast to the baatrum,, but before I could THINK, BLINK, or TURN ON THE LIGHT, I alredi done it !”

Patel is now the new “Greeter” at Wal-Mart in Washington.

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