Category Archives: School Jokes

Late Because Class Started Before I Got Here

TEACHER: Why are you late? STUDENT: Class started before I got here. ____________________________________ TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor? JOHN: You told me to do it without using tables. __________________________________________ TEACHER: Glenn, how do … Continue reading

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Little Ralphy: Using Beautiful in a Sentence

One day, during lessons on proper grammar, the teacher asked for a show of hands from those who could use the word ‘beautiful’ in the same sentence twice. First, she called on little Suzie, who responded with, ‘My father bought … Continue reading

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Little Ralphy On English

Little RALPHY goes to school, and the teacher says, ‘Today we are going to learn multi-syllable words, class. Does anybody have an example of a multi-syllable word?’ RALPHY says ‘Mas-tur-bate..’ Miss Rogers smiles and says, ‘Wow, little RALPHY, that’s a … Continue reading

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Little Ralphy: ‘How Much is 3×2?”

Little RALPHY returns from school and says he got an F in arithmetic. ‘Why?’ asks the father? ‘The teacher asked ‘How much is 2×3,” I said ‘6’, replies RALPHY. ‘But that’s right!’ says his dad. ‘Yeah, but then she asked … Continue reading

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Little Ralphy On Maths

A teacher asks her class, ‘If there are five birds sitting on a fence and you shoot one of them, how many will be left?’ She calls on little Ralphy. He replies, ‘None, they will all fly away with the … Continue reading

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Why Blood Does Not Rush to Our Feet?

A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood. Trying to make the matter clearer, she said, ‘Now, class, if I stood on my head, the blood, as you know, would run into it, and I would … Continue reading

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A Dead Teacher

The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture. ‘Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grown up … Continue reading

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Commandment about Teaching Your Brothers & Sisters

A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year olds. After explaining the commandment to ‘honour’ thy Father and thy Mother, she asked, ‘Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our … Continue reading

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A Kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while they were drawing. She would occasionally walk around to see each child’s work. As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what the drawing was. … Continue reading

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A Whale Cannot Swallow a Human

A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales. The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small. The little … Continue reading

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